11/4/16

Grace snuck in



Grace showed up softly. No grand entrance. Just sneaking in leaving only footprints to prove it really came.

It's always in the wee hours of the night when emotions become grander than they really are. When all is quiet it becomes easy to let worry or sadness or loneliness become much bigger than they truly are. It was a night where I felt sorry for myself and I had no reason to. I couldn't pinpoint the source for myself pity, but pity myself I did. Because, well, that's one of my talents. I can make my life sound pretty crummy even in the fantastic because I am selfish and so bad at seeing the grace even if it's looking me dead in the eye.

So it was one of those nights when emotions were grander than they truly are when grace tip toed in. Right smack dab in the middle of my worry I stopped, shrugged my shoulders and said to myself, "it's late and I can't trust my head right now." I then picked up the Bible and began reading out loud.

No trying to pin point the source of my emotions. No trying to figure out the why behind my worry and sadness. I didn't need to. It was late and I knew my head wasn't in a good place. I couldn't trust it.

But I could trust the word of God, which is Truth. I could praise the one who is perfectly consistent. Who doesn't change in the wee hours of the night but remains good, steadfast, and glorious.

This was the grace of the Holy Spirit. This was the strength and sound mind I don't have but he grants me. Left to myself I would go deeper and deeper into my heartache. But he stopped me. He pointed my eyes up when I just wanted to look in the mirror at myself.

His grace came quietly and shook away the darkness of the night.

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